Category: The Cat

Conversations with my cat

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*pretends to be asleep, opens one eye, rolls eye around – no sign of cat. Slips out of bed as quietly as possible, pauses, listening. No cat. Slips into hallway, quietly moves down the stairs, slowly inches closer to the…

Conversations with my cat

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“You know, we have an odd relationship.” “…who’re you again?” “I feed you. I clean up your poop. I make sure you have fresh water in your dish.” “is this going somewhere?  I have plans…” “Yes this is going somewhere. …

Conversations with my cat

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*sneaks into the living room looking for the cat. finds him sound asleep in his bed. Pauses, listening to the gentle snore, then sneaks out of the living room.  Retrieves fresh laundry from the dryer, places it on the bed.…

Conversations with my cat

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*Hops up onto the stool, then onto the back of the stool. Gracefully moves from back to back to-stumbles, panics, tries to save himself from falling, fails, stool rocks, he falls, crashing onto the table, freaks out, scratches and slides,…

Conversations with my cat

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“C’mere, I wanna show you something…” “What? No. Leave me alone. Loser. Put me down!” “I think you’ll like this…” “Hey – get your hands off me! I said no! No means no! RAPE!” “Calm down… You’re really going to…

Conversations with my cat

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“Hey! What’s that? Is that mine? Can I have that? What is it?” “Um… yeah, it’s yours. I guess.” “Ooooo! What is it? Can I eat it?” “Um… no, no you can’t eat it.. it’s.. well..” “What?! WHAT?! LET ME…

Conversations with my cat

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*staring in the corner* “What’cha lookin at?” “shhhh.” *staring* “What is it?” “shhhh.” *staring* *moves closer* “What do you see?” *sits up* “Great! Just great! It got away!” *stalks away* *staring in the corner* “…what got away? WHAT THE HELL…

Conversations with my cat

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“I’m home!” *stares out the window* “Hey there! Who want’s their ears scratched?” *stares out the window* “Hello? Hey? Are you excited just a little bit to see me?” *stares out the window* “I should’ve gotten a dog. They’re happy…

Conversations with my cat

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*hops up onto the desk, stands in front of the keyboard* “Hello!” “…um, hi. Can you move? I’m trying to write.” “Sure!” *doesn’t move* “Um…” *sits down, tail on the spacebar causing the cursor to race across the screen* “Ack!…

Conversations with my cat

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“So….” “Yes?” “You know I bought you a bed, right? Sits on the bookshelf by the window?” “Uh-huh.” “And I have another one here in my room for you – so you can curl up when I’m on the computer.”…