Dick Grayson was the youngest member of a circus highwire act known as ‘The Flying Graysons’.  When his family was killed right in front of him, it struck Bruce Wayne right where it hurts because it was like watching his own parents die all [...]]]> One of my favorite characters in the Batman universe is Dick Grayson.

Dick Grayson was the youngest member of a circus highwire act known as ‘The Flying Graysons’.  When his family was killed right in front of him, it struck Bruce Wayne right where it hurts because it was like watching his own parents die all over again.

Bruce felt such a kinship for the orphaned boy that he offered to take him in and become his guardian.  Dick became Robin, partner to Batman and a crime fighter in his own right.

He was 8 years old.

And that’s why I don’t want Robin in Batman 3.

Hollywood is enamored with itself and as such, likes to A) change things and B) play homage to its own past.  To Hollywood, Dick Grayson / Robin is really Burt Ward or, even worse (I know, how could anything be worse?) Chris O’Donnel.  If Robin appears in Batman 3, once again they’ll get some 30 yr old actor to portray him and then wtf was the point?

Robin is a KID.

Chris O'Donnell could have played Nightwing at his age, but not a convincing Robin.

Yes he grows up.  Yes he is replaced once in a while (what are we, on #4 right now?) but the point is still the same – he is a kid!  An 8 year old kid, and Hollywood doesn’t like that for a lot of reasons.

First and foremost – having kids on set costs more.  You can’t keep them up all day and night like you can an adult actor, and they have to go to school which means tutors.  That’s why half the time the kid you see on screen isn’t even really a kid, it’s some twenty-something who just happens to look young enough to play sixteen.

Second, I don’t think they really know what to do with Robin.  They like the silly Robin from the tv show, not the rebellious Robin struggling to figure out who he is from the comics.  Plus, you have this Dark Knight who strikes fear in the hearts of the bad guys and he’s running around with a kid wearing bright green and yellow?

They don’t know what to do with him.

And because they don’t know what to do with him, I’d rather not see him in Batman 3.

~P

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We had what became dubbed as the ‘creepy stalker Superman’ from actor Bandon Routh who, in my humble opinion, played the part [...]]]> Rumors abound regarding all of the comic books movies coming down the pipe and Superman 2 (or is it 6?) is on the list.  But the reboot of Superman didn’t do so well, remember?

We had what became dubbed as the ‘creepy stalker Superman’ from actor Bandon Routh who, in my humble opinion, played the part as stiff and unemotional as Keanu Reeves.  Who wants to see a sequel to that?

So there are a couple things I think they could so that would make the movie successful and, since I know the heads of DC and Warner Brothers are constantly trolling my little website (Uh… right.), I figured I’d lay out the changes they need to make if they want to see this next movie fly…

Get rid of silly Lex Luthor

The original Superman came out in 1978 and was great.  Christopher Reeves played the iconic part along side Gene Hackman as an over the top version of Lex Luthor as the ultimate silly supervillain.  Well, it’s thirty years later people.  Lex Luthor has been retconned into the CEO of a mega corporation and has even held the office of the President of the United States; the time for silly Lux running around in wigs and conning dying women out of their fortunes is over.  Play him straight or don’t play him at all.

Which actually wouldn’t be a bad idea at all.  Superman has other enemies just as Batman has other enemies.  Pull one of them out and dust em off for the movie treatment.  Let’s see Braniac or Darkseid give the man of steel a fight we’ll never forget.  Or better yet – since you love trilogies so much (Sorry John and Dale), let’s bring in Doomsday and do it up right, kill Superman in the first film, deal with the aftermath in the second and his rebirth/return in the third.  I’d pay to see that.

Start Fresh

Look, we love the Christopher Reeves movies, we really did.  Even 4.  Okay, not 4.  Or 3.  But we watched them because of Reeves.  They were great movies, but when Chris Nolan sat down to do Batman, he didn’t try to paint a homage to Tim Burton and look how utterly fantastic Batman and The Dark Knight turned out!  Do that with Superman.  If you want to draw from previous materials, draw from the comics, not the movies, not the tv shows, dear GOD not from Smallville – you can do it and do it well.  Chris Nolan proved it.

Drop Brandon Routh

I’m sorry, I’m sure Brandon is a great guy but when I see him, I see creepy stalker Superman.  His recent run on Chuck, one of my favorite shows on tv, was distracting because I kept thinking, “Don’t trust creepy stalker Superman! Don’t trust him!”

His portrayal of Supes was flat, unemotional.  If it was the intention of the powers that be for him to be emotionally detached then I suppose he hit the mark spot on, but it was a terrible thing to do to him and to us.  Give us some emotion in our Superman, some passion.

So.  That’s it.  My suggestions for a killer Superman flick; no more silly Lex, a different enemy for Superman to fight, a fresh break from the previous films and a new actor in the title role.

We’ll have to wait and see what they actually do, but not long.  I think they have the Superman film greenlit for 2011 or 2012…

~P

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But sometimes, something gets a sequel that isn’t quite on your radar, or anybodies radar, really.  In other cases, something is so good [...]]]> We’re not strangers to sequels; they happen all the time.  Ghostbusters, Star Trek, Back to the Future, Men in Black, Star Wars – heck, even Starship Troopers earned a few low budget sequels.

But sometimes, something gets a sequel that isn’t quite on your radar, or anybodies radar, really.  In other cases, something is so good you can’t imagine anyone ever doing a sequel to it because, let’s face it, sometimes down is the only way left to go (can you say ‘Matrix Revolutions’?).

One of the craziest sequels I only recently learned about was for the Lord of the Rings.

Ironically, the Lord of the Rings was, in itself, a sequel to The Hobbit.  I don’t have to tell you (but I will anyway because I have a whole post to fill here) that the story took place after the events of The Hobbit and followed the journey of Bilbo Baggin’s nephew, Frodo, as he attempted to sneak into the Dark One’s own lands to destroy the ring of power.

Tolkien himself planned a sequel to the Lord of the Rings that would be set in the Fourth Age (notes were found which confirm this).  When he died in 1973, there were only notes and maps and as yet, nothing has come from them (His son may or may not do something – you never know).

In 1977, another author tried his hand at writing a sequel.  His name was Big Balls McBallsy Balls, aka Dennis L. McKiernan.

McKiernan had been in a car accident and, while convalescing, starting writing.  his story was good enough that his publisher did attempt to get permission to publish, but the Tolkien estate said, “Uh… No.”

SO, what’s a writer to do?

Probably write another book.  But if you’ve got a publisher going, “But – we like this book!” something else is probably going to happen.  And did.  They asked him to rework the whole thing so it became an original piece that they could publish.

Thus was born The Iron Tower Trilogy.

The trilogy feels very much like a Tolkien book except Hobbits are now Warrows.  If you read through it, you can draw parallels between Middle Earth and Mithgar.

Kraggen-Cor is Moria, for example.

I knew none of this when I first read the books and I enjoyed them immensely.  I still do, having reread them a few times.

Had McKiernan stopped there, I think people would have perhaps written the books off as an oddity, but he didn’t stop there.  Once he got going, he didn’t stop.  He wrote more books, expanding the world and the mythology of Mithgar.  He gave it its own voice, separate and apart from Tolkien’s.

Comparisons are still drawn and rightly so considering the origin of it all, but each book has taken it further and further away.

Another odd sequel

When you wander through bookstores the way I do, you come across all sorts of strange things.  Take, for example, the film ‘Willow’.

Willow didn’t make a ton of money, but I loved it.  Still love it.

Willow follows the story of Willow Ufgood, an aspiring sorcerer who is trying to return a baby girl to her people, then finds himself having to protect that baby from the evil queen Bavmorda.

He ends up getting some help from a soldier / rogue named Madmartigan, Cherlindrea, queen of the fairies and brownies, the sorceress Fin Raziel and a pair of (hilarious) Brownies named Rool and Franjean.

Together, they have to save the baby, overthrow the evil queen and set the kingdom right again.

All in all, a great flick.  Really love it.

Which is why it blew me away when I learned there was a sequel.

Well, a trilogy of sequels.

The Chronicles of the Shadow War, written by Chris Claremont based on some sort of outline by George Lucas, contains three novels: Shadow Moon, Shadow Dawn & Shadow Star.

I read the first two books, Shadow Moon & Dawn and I have to say, what the fuck?

I like to think I’m an intelligent guy, but I just didn’t get it.

Willow becomes this hard ass with a new name (Thorn Drumheller), Madmartigan & Sasha get killed in the opening moments, all this weird stuff keeps happening – I just didn’t get it.  Heck, I still don’t get it.

Even wikipedia doesn’t get it because no one has ever bothered to add plot summaries to the book pages.

The official schpeal makes it all sound so simple:

“In Shadow Moon, war and chaos have gripped the land of Tir Asleen. An ancient prophecy reveals one hope: a savior princess who will ascend to the throne when the time is right. But first, a Nelwyn wanderer must face forces of unimaginable malevolence and dangerous, forbidden rites of necromancy that could bring back a powerful warrior from soulless sleep.”

I swear to you – the book (in my mind) bears little resemblance to that little paragraph.

Shadow Dawn didn’t get any clearer:

“The momentous Ascension of Princess Elora Danan should have brought peace to the Thirteen Realms. Instead, an intense Shadow War rages, spearheaded by the evil Mohdri. He has dispatched his dread Black Rose commando assassins to capture Elora and her sworn protector, Thorn Drumheller. But Mohdri himself is just a facade for a more dangerous entity: the Deceiver. But who–or what–is the Deceiver? And how can Elora, Thorn, and their ragtag band defeat this unspeakable force? The answer lies in a perilous journey to a land undisturbed since the dawn of time. A journey that will end at the unbreachable citadel of the dragon, where a chilling betrayal will change the fate of Elora, Thorn, and the Thirteen Realms forever.”

And finally, Shadow Star (which I never bothered to read because, honestly, I was so confused…):

“To prevent the great dragons from falling into the hands of the Deceiver, Elora Danan, warrior, mage, and savior of the Twelve Kingdoms committed a desperate act, slaying the great creatures over the objections of her trusted companions. Spellbound to her friends in order to preserve the two remaining dragon eggs and guarantee their future survival, Elora discovers that she has opened herself to an unexpected evil and placed herself in danger of becoming that which she most fears.”

Having read as much of the sequels as I did, I was sort of glad that Lucas never tried to take it to film; I think it would have been a disaster of Jar Jar proportions…

Anyway, there are a couple of sequels I thought you may not have known about before.

~P

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My new house has no BestBuy conveniently sitiated (pronounced sitch-ee-ated) nearby (I buy most [...]]]> I’ve been a fan of the DC animated films for quite some time now, so when I heard about their latest, Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths, I couldn’t wait for it to come out – which was yesterday! (Tuesday, Feb 23rd)

My new house has no BestBuy conveniently sitiated (pronounced sitch-ee-ated) nearby (I buy most of my DVD’s at BestBuy. We have a hate/hate relationship, but I still shop there because you love the one you hate or you hate the one you love or some such…).  There IS a BestBuy nearish work, so I headed over at lunch and picked up the 2-disc, digital copy set.  I’ve bought these before and it’s worked well – I get a DVD copy for the big tv and an iTunes digital copy for the computer.

This time around, it didn’t work so well.  When I followed the instructions to dl my digital copy, I found myself at a Warner Brothers website informing me that the digital copy was Windows only.

BOOOOOO!  BOOOOOOO WARNER BROTHERS!  BAD WARNER BROTHERS!!  BAD!  *rolled up newspaper to the nose*

…anyway, about the movie.

Loved it.

Let me see if I can tell you about it without spoiling it.

ENGAGE COMIC BOOK NERD BRAIN FOR BACKSTORY!

The DC Universe has a lot of characters in it.  Way back when, they started rebooting popular characters from the Golden Age – like Flash, Green Lantern, etc.  Eventually, this caught up to them and they needed a house cleaning because they had so many different versions of what was essentially the same hero spanning 50 years of publishing.  Enter Crisis on Infinite Earths.  Drilling down that story – they used 12 issues of what they called a ‘maxi-series’, to clean up their universe.  They explained that there were multiple earths, each with its own history, its own stories and superheroes (The Multiverse).  They introduced the concept of an ‘Earth Prime’ from which all other earths sprang, so to speak.

"Somewhere in here is what I like to call 'Earth Prime'."

Crisis on Two Earths plays on this by introducing an earth where the Justice League is lead by none other than Lex Luther, and where that Justice League has been beaten by a super powered criminal empire known as the Crime Syndicate.  the Syndicate is made up of mirror universe versions of the heroes we know; Flash, Superman, Wonder Woman, Batman, Green Lantern and the Martian Manhunter – Johnny Quick, Ultraman, Superwoman, Owlman, Power Ring and they don’t really name him so I guess he’s just the Martian Manhunter on both sides which is kinda lame cuz, I mean, heck – you came up with all these new names for the mirror universe versions of the other people so you couldn’t spend maybe a half an hour coming up with the ‘Saturn Kid’ or some such nonsense?  Really?

The Justice League

The Crime Syndicate

Like any good movie featuring any sort of faithful version of Batman, he’s an asshole.  So is Owlman.  Also, just like any sort of Justice League movie, Green Lantern is a throw away character and hardly has anything to do, which is sad.  I suppose they justify this (PUN!) by saying they did that whole ‘First Flight’ movie.  Whatever – I say, GIVE HAL JORDAN MORE SCREEN TIME, DAMMIT!

Main plot is simple: Luthor crosses over, asks for help, Justice League sans Batman (cuz he’s an ASSHOLE PEOPLE) goes to help.  Mischief ensues, bad guys cross back over forcing Batman to get involved (which just pisses him off because he really wanted to just hang out in his new satellite, turn the lights off and brood.  Quietly.  Maybe torture himself with some photos of his parents or some Yanni.) and leads to MY FAVORITE PART OF THE MOVIE:

"GET AWAY FROM HER YOU BITCH!"

…wait, I’m getting my movies mixed up.  What was I thinking about?  Oh!  Yeah!  I got it:

"You're on my property. Stand down."

Yeah.  That’s more like it.  What’s that, Bats?  Something more to say?

Sounds like ‘Bring it’ to me!

Anyway, more mischief, Batman has to crossover now, silly sub plot with Martian Manhunter, we get to see a red version of Green Arrow, etc and so on and I won’t spoil the ending for you.

Overall, I really enjoyed it.  Gina Torres as Superwoman and James Woods as Owlman absolutely steal the show.  I loved their voices.  Not so fond of Mark Harmon & William Baldwin as Superman and Batman respectively.  Previous actors have simply made their marks on these iconic characters and you really have to step up if you want to play in their sandboxes which, sadly, neither of these actors achieved.

Bonus Review: Showcase: The Spectre

Having said all of that, the absolute delight of the DVD has to be the special Showcase: The Spectre short film. Oh. My. God. Loved it.  Absolutely friggin loved it.  If they’re trying to get interest to make a show or a full length movie, baby I am on board and ready to go!  Sign me up!

If you don’t know the character, The Spectre is the ghost of Jim Corrigan, a police detective who was murdered.  When he died, his spirit was refused entry into the afterlife.  As a spirit, he was assigned the duty to find justice for those in need of it and to eliminate evil.  He does this as The Spectre.

Similar to the Ghost Rider except without the motorcycle and the fireball head and all the demon stuff.

For the short film, they went with a retro 70’s look and feel and it just fit the material so well.  Corrigan is on the trail of the people who killed his galpal’s dad, and The Spectre is looking to dole out some justice.  70’s style.

*cue cheesy music*

Again, I don’t want to spoil it for you but I will say that it felt like a taste of something that could be, a quick little peak (sort of like a pilot episode) into this character and what he’s all about.  Voiced by the fantastic Gary Cole (the Nighthawk!), I felt he really brought the character to life.  What a wonderful addition this was to the disc!

Jim Corrigan

"I am Vengeance. I am The Spectre!"

"In the land beyond the living, all things are possible."

So – check it out if you have the funds available, I bought the 2 disc, regular DVD (I don’t have BluRay) version for $20 at BestBuy.  Well worth your time if you enjoy comics and, specifically, the Justice League.  If you are a Marvel fan over all I will say this – the DC animated features have just been better.  I’ve watched the Ultimate Avengers pieces and the Hulk Vs and I think the DC stuff has just told the stories better and done the animation better.  Give it a shot – you may like it.

~P

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I think it’s sort of a staple of the genre now.  If you’re going to have a futuristic/scifi [...]]]> If, like me, you’re an avid watcher of tv and movies, and a reader of books, you may have noticed a trend towards the disastrous future.  Apocalypse is in and in big.  I mean, it’s everywhere we look.

I think it’s sort of a staple of the genre now.  If you’re going to have a futuristic/scifi story, it damned well better show us how badly we, as a species, have screwed everything up.  Right now at theaters around the country, we have ‘The Book of Eli’, a post-apocalyptic tale of the future.  On TV we have ‘Dollhouse’ that depicts (in Epitaph One and supposedly, Epitaph Two airing this week), a future where science and technology have caused an apocalypse and the overall destruction of all civilization as we know it.

It’s the end all be all of trends.

So I ask you – where has the positive future gone?

In Gene Roddenberry’s Star Trek (rebooted last summer and done so quite successfully), we have a future where yes, bad stuff happened and we humans were the cause, but we’ve moved passed that and are now soaring through the stars exploring strange new worlds and all that jazz.  Kinda positive, right?  But it’s the exception to the rule anymore.  I mean, look at what we’ve seen from Hollywood in the past few years:

Jericho

Post apocalypse America where the folks of a small town struggle to survive after nuclear bomb s have destroyed civilization as we know it.

The City of Ember

Based on the Young Adult novels of Jeanne DuPrau, The City of Ember shows a world that was torn by war, so they built a city underground for protection.

The Road

Another post-apocalyptic tale – this one about a father and his young son across a landscape blasted by an unnamed cataclysm that destroyed all civilization and, apparently, almost all life on earth.

Jeremiah

This series takes place in a post-apocalyptic future where most of the adult population has been wiped out by a deadly virus.

I mean, the list goes on and on.

So I ask you again – where has the positive gone?

Are we done with the feel good adventure tale?  With the bright, shining future of the human race, all full of potential and excitement?

What do you think?

~P

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*sorta spoilery but not really*

Mom: “Ooo.  That was a good movie.”

Me: “Yeah?”

Mom: “I really liked it.”

Me: “Good!’

Mom: “Those Illuminati…  You know – they just met in secret!”

Me: “They did?”

Mom: “Yep.”

Me: “So wait – the super secret society known as the Illuminati just met [...]]]> Mom’s comments about the movie, ‘Angels & Demons’, which takes place in Vatican City:

*sorta spoilery but not really*

Mom: “Ooo.  That was a good movie.”

Me: “Yeah?”

Mom: “I really liked it.”

Me: “Good!’

Mom: “Those Illuminati…  You know – they just met in secret!”

Me: “They did?”

Mom: “Yep.”

Me: “So wait – the super secret society known as the Illuminati just met and you heard about it?”

Mom: “Yes.  On the radio.  They’re bad news.”

Me: “The super secret society of Illuminati just met, in secret, and you heard about it on the radio?”

Mom: “Oh, yes!  No one knows who they are or where they met but it’s not good for us.”

Me: “Wait – no one knows who they are, no one knows where they met, but the whole thing was advertised on the radio?”

Mom: “Well, not advertised – but people were talking about it.”

Me: “Which people?”

Mom: “People who know.”

Me: “‘People who know’?”  *thinks about this for a second*  “Art Bell?”

Mom: “There’s nothing wrong with Art Bell!  He -knows- things!”

Me: “…ok.”

~P

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…now that the movie [...]]]> One of the things I noticed when I watched last summers blockbuster, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra, was that the workers in the undersea MARS facility, seemed to be wearing Deep Space Nine era Starfleet uniforms.  I couldn’t prove it, of course – I didn’t have screen shots from the movie.

…now that the movie is out on DVD, though…

Actually, getting a decent screen shot proved difficult.  Still, I managed.

So – first off, let’s take a look at the DS9 uniform:

That’s courtesy of some costume shop. Here it is actually on the crew:

Essentially, what the costumers did was take the color’s of the Starfleet uniform that we all knew and loved (red, blue, gold) and made them like an under shirt with a black and gray coat over them.  Pips go on the collar, communicator on the chest.

I liked these a lot better than the all in one jumpsuits from the 1st season and even better than the 1-piece uniforms of subsequent TNG seasons.  Very sleek.

Now, let’s take a look at the uniforms worn by the MARS employees in G.I. Joe: the Rise of Cobra:

That really was the absolute best shot I could’ve gotten.  When these guys go by on screen, it’s so fast, you only catch flashes of the outfit (but it was enough to make me go, hmmm).  In this one, we can see that it’s -very- similar.  Burgundy under shirt with a gray and black overcoat.  Stripes on the shoulders and (vertical) cuffs are different (on DS9, they ring around the cuff), as are the pockets and the zipper.

Another shot shows a slightly different angle and (apparently) different coat:

No pockets on this one that I can see, which leads me to believe there’s a couple versions of the coat.

Did Paramount decide to save a little cash by using the old DS9 uniforms?  Just changing them up a little? I don’t know, maybe.

What do you think?

~P

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This was the beginning to what has become the most iconic science fiction television series of all time – and [...]]]> Space.  The Final Frontier.  These are the voyages of the starship, Enterprise.  Its mission; to explore strange, new worlds, to seek out, new life and new civilizations, to boldly go, where no man has gone, before…

This was the beginning to what has become the most iconic science fiction television series of all time – and the most hotly debated.  Some people think it is the worst thing that could have ever happened to SciFi.  Others, that it symbolizes everything that SciFi should be; part cerebral, part western expansion and all adventure.

We all know the story; Farm boy dreams of bigger and better things, joins the military, meets a southern doctor and goes off to have an adventure.  They meet an Elf who seems to know just about everything about anything and the three of them live happily, ever after… mostly.

When it was cancelled in ‘69, many thought that was the end.  Silly, silly people.  Star Trek lived on in novels and comics and, eventually, came back in the form of a series of block buster movies and then several follow-up television series set in the future of the Federation.

But today, we’re looking at comics.  First up to have the license was Gold Key.  I don’t have any of the Gold Key comics but I went out and found some cover art for you to take a gander at:

Gold Key had the license from ‘67 – ‘78.  I have no idea whatsoever if they were any good or not.  The cover art is very interesting though…  Gold Key held a lot of tv licenses though, so I wonder about quality of story and art.  If you are a fan, please let me know how these books were.

Next to have the license was Marvel.  Again, I don’t have any of these (that I recall).  BUT, I went out and found you some more cover art to check out.  Compare it to the Gold Key above – you can definitely see the ‘Marvel Style’ coming out in this cover:

My initial reaction to these very different covers are this: Gold Key obviously did not have permission to use the font/logo, which Marvel did (or maybe they did, but chose to use something different?  Who knows?!).  Gold Key’s artwork is very retro/indicative of the 60’s (to me) compared to Marvel’s artwork which looks oh so very 80’s to me and very much in the Marvel style of books printed at the time.  Gold Key had better likenesses of the characters at first glance (McCoy & Uhura? look terrible on the Marvel cover – though Spock is recognizable as Spock).  Other than that, I don’t have much to say since I started when DC took over.  Again, if you’re a fan of the Marvel run, let me know – I’d love to learn more about them.

Speaking of DC…

My very first Star Trek Comic.  As you can see, the Enterprise is heading straight for a fight with the Klingons.

DC’s run was my favorite.  I’m going to talk about the publishers who came after in another post, but the rest of this one is all DC, so buckle up.

DC’s take was decent and faithful, in my humble opinion.  They had a lot of stuff that they had to deal with – mainly, the movies (There was no ‘Next Generation’ yet).  Essentially, the movies were canon.  Novelizations – not canon.  Comics, not canon.  SO any time they had a movie, the writers of the comics had to adapt.  Most of the time they did an excellent job.

When Star Trek 3 came out and Spock died, for example, they adapted in the comics and introduced new characters, had Saavik step in – that sort of thing.  Then, when Star Trek 4 came out, which took place days (or possibly weeks) following 3, they had to adapt again.  Same for when Star Trek 5 came out – had to adapt.

Above you see two of the WORST characters ever created.  They were in Shatner’s ‘Final Frontier’, which was just horrible.

One of the things that the comics was able to deal with (somewhat), was the Trial of James T. Kirk.  Something that always bothered a cousin of mine, was the line from one of the movies (Was it 3 or 4?) wherein the Klingon Ambassador told the President of the Federation, “There will be no peace as long as Kirk lives.”.  When 6 came about, and Spock was suing for Peace with the Chancellor, that same cousin just couldn’t buy it due to that line from the movie.

In the comics, they brought this point back and actually had the Trial.

A three part story-arc, The Trial of James T. Kirk allowed the writers to bring back many characters (including: Samuel T. Cogsley) from past storylines going back to the original television series.  The prosecution was trying to prove that Kirk had interfered with dozens of cultures throughout the decades, violating the Prime Directive time and again, causing chaos and leaving each world in a state of disarray they found it difficult, if not impossible, to recover from.

The verdict came in and Kirk was cleared of all charges and the Enterprise returned to duty once it became clear that there was a plot going on to cause mischief.  We also learned that the Klingon’s had a secret spy in Starfleet – that would come back later on.

It was an interesting story and take on the trial, and gave them an excuse to trot out a lot of the characters that we really wouldn’t have otherwise seen.

One of the things that comics (and novelizations) could do that Hollywood couldn’t (until 2009, that is), was bring us back to the original 5-year mission.

So, rather than go in a straight line, so to speak – a lot of time, DC would take us back and forth – give us a few issues or a story arc in the ‘current continuity’, and sometimes go back and tell us a story from the past.  With this method, they managed to keep us entertained and engaged.  Fans of the Original Series got to see ‘Classic Trek’, or they could see something with the older crew still chugging along.

And, what Trek book (or post) would be complete if we didn’t have Enterprise shown in all her glory! Through the years, they did a lot of really fantastic covers that featured Enterprise in every way and shape possible.  Here are a couple of my favorites:

I have more to say about the DC run of Star Trek.  Stay tuned…

~P

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As a sort of homage/tie-in, I thought I’d bring you a couple of the comic book adaptations.  First up, one of the best of the Trek movies ever made – Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country:

After the disaster that was ‘The Final Frontier’, [...]]]> Today, JJ Trek (also known as ‘Star Trek’) drops on DVD shelves everywhere.

As a sort of homage/tie-in, I thought I’d bring you a couple of the comic book adaptations.  First up, one of the best of the Trek movies ever made – Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country:

After the disaster that was ‘The Final Frontier’, ‘The Undiscovered Country’ was a great flick and comic.

Brief synopsis: Federation: “We want to help you now that you’re only source of energy has been destroyed. Dumbasses.”  Klingons: “Oh no you din’t!” Federation: “I mean, honestly – who keeps a single moon as their ‘chief energy source’ – who does that? *laughs*”  Klingons: “I KEEL YOU!”  Federation: “With what? YOU DON’T HAVE ANY MORE ENERGY, REMEMBER?”  Klingons: “WE HAVE SHAKESPEARE!” Federation: “. . .  Well, now you’re just making shit up.  Who do you think you are?  Chekov?”

…um.  Yes.  Well.  That…  Yeah…

Moving on…

Of course, the film that followed The Undiscovered Country was horrible.  ‘Generations’ was punctuated with bad lighting, a bad story, Klingon’s too stupid to say ‘Disengage cloak and raise shields’ in the five minutes it took for a torpedo to cross the space between them and the Enterprise – not to mention the fact that they couldn’t shoot worth a shit and, of course, two horrible endings wherein our Captain, Kirk, gets kilted.

In the cover above, Captain Picard is reaching for your wallet and asking, “Give me $4 for this excrement.”  See, he wouldn’t say ‘crap’. He’s too classy for that.  The artwork was better than the poorly lit flick of the same name.

Intended to launch a series of films based on the wildly popular Next generation tv show, it was also supposed to ‘bridge’ the Next Generation and the Original series by having Kirk in it.  They killed Kirk in it.  Badly.  In two versions.  There were not a lot of fans of the way he died.  Either time.

Brief synopsis: “Paramount wants us to do another season!” “Shit! That’s like… *does math on fingers real quick* Um… a lot of shows and stuff!  Quick – somebody write a movie!  They only need to be like, one hour or something.  What’s that?”  “Three day old mooshoo pork.”  “Can it type?  Never mind – it’s hired – ‘head writer’ has a nice ring to it, eh?  Eh?”  “It moved!”  “And moved me as well – I think I heard it say, ‘Paul is dead’…”  “Wait – what if -we- kill Paul?”  “There is no ‘Paul’ in Star Trek.  Paul is in Dune.”  “Oh, right.  We could write one!”  “Yeah!  No, wait – that’s just stupid.  Let’s kill someone that’s already written – it’ll be less hassle than dealing with a new.. ah… what do you call them?”  “Actors?”  “Yeah – those.  Let’s just kill someone else.  Who could we kill…”  “Look!  It’s Kirk!  Kirk Cameron – right there outside our offices!”  “Hey… I think you may have stumbled onto something…”  “Yeah?”  “We can kill the kid!  Wesley!”  “Uh, he’s no longer under contract.”  “Shit.  Wait a minute – did you say ‘mooshoo pork’?!”  “Yes.”  “That’s inspired!  We’ll kill Kirk!”  “Oooo – I like it.  He’s old – we have to pay him tons just to show up.”  “Right you are – it’s a ‘win-win’!”

Never one to let his character be dead – Shatner brought Kirk back in a novel called ‘The Return’:

Which (Yes, I own it) he referenced (What? So I bought the damned book!) in his complaints (I WAS CURIOUS!) that he wasn’t included (STOP GIVING ME THAT LOOK! IT’S JUST A DAMNED BOOK!) in the reboot the way Nimoy (FINE! FINE! I BOUGHT -ALL- THE DAMN BOOKS! ARE YOU HAPPY?!  ARE YOU?!) was (…and I read them, too.).  There was something about JJ saying it would be difficult to bring Kirk back since he died in canon, to which Shatner said: “I did it.”

BTW, I didn’t like this book (shaddup…).

The last adaptation I have is for ‘First Contact’.

This is my favorite of the Next Gen movies and a great adaptation.  I admit it – I cringe and jump a little every time I see the needle go towards Picard’s eye in the dream sequence.  YEESH!

Synopsis: “Berman, I’m boooorrrred.” “Hmmm.  We could do another movie.”  “That could be fun. You know what I liked?” “What’s that?” “When Data banged Tasha Yar.  He needs to get a little more action, ya know?”  “Spiner would be down with that.  The man lives for sex.”  “Really?”  “No.  But how to work a love interest into a Next Gen movie and have it make sense?”  “What if the Borg aren’t really a collective, but they have a Queen and she’s kinda freaky, kinda hot and has a thing for Data and wants to jump his bones?”  “Hmmm.  That could work.  but what about the rest of the crew?” “Ah, I don’t know – let’s say the Borg have traveled into the past and are trying to assimilate humans before anything began.  We can throw some Vulcans in, have everybody camping out in the trees or something – it’ll be a hoot.”  “Camping?  Sounds very cheap.  I can sell Paramount on cheap.”  “And if it doesn’t suck, the fans will stop burning you in effigy at Creation!”  “…wouldn’t that be a nice change?”

Well, that’s it – that’s my little tour down Star Trek movie adaptation lane.  Hope you liked it.

~P

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Stan Helsing.

This could be the stupidest movie ever made. Or it could be hilarious.  I DON’T KNOW!

It’s Halloween night, and slacker video clerk Stan Helsing – along with his insanely sexy ex-girlfriend, best buddy and an exotic dancer/’massage therapist’ – detours into a town cursed by the [...]]]> Was checking out movie trailers and wanted to share.

Stan Helsing.

This could be the stupidest movie ever made. Or it could be hilarious.  I DON’T KNOW!

It’s Halloween night, and slacker video clerk Stan Helsing – along with his insanely sexy ex-girlfriend, best buddy and an exotic dancer/’massage therapist’ – detours into a town cursed by the biggest monsters in movie history: Freddy, Jason, Pinhead, Leatherface, Chucky, & Michael Myers. But when Stan discovers that he’s a direct descendant of the legendary monster hunter Van Helsing, the four will have to survive a night of hell raisers, hockey masks, psycho dolls, pleather faces, creepy hitchhikers, vampire strippers, killer karaoke, and lots of hot chicks kissing each other. The one and only Leslie Nielsen of AIRPLANE! and THE NAKED GUN co-stars in this hysterical horror spoof written and directed by one of the guys who brought you SCARY MOVIE.

Season of the Witch.

I know nothing about this except that it has a FREAKY trailer.

Comingsoon.net says: Plot Summary: In the supernatural thriller “Season of the Witch,” Nicolas Cage stars as a 14th century Crusader who returns with his comrade (Ron Perlman) to a homeland devastated by the Black Plague. A beleaguered church, deeming sorcery the culprit of the plague, commands the two knights to transport an accused witch (Claire Foy) to a remote abbey, where monks will perform a ritual in hopes of ending the pestilence.

The Spy Next Door.

Jackie Chan as a spy who is tasked with babysitting some kids. …wait, didn’t Dwayne Johnson already make this movie??

Edge of Darkness.

Holy crap. Mel Gibson made a good movie again?!  WOW! And it has Wil Scarlett in it!  SOLD!

Plot Summary: “Edge of Darkness” is an emotionally charged thriller set at the intersection of politics and big business. Thomas Craven (Mel Gibson) is a veteran homicide detective for the Boston Police Department and a single father. When his only child, twenty-four year-old Emma (Bojana Novakovic), is murdered on the steps of his home, everyone assumes that he was the target. But he soon suspects otherwise, and embarks on a mission to find out about his daughter’s secret life and her killing. His investigation leads him into a dangerous, looking glass world of corporate cover-ups, government collusion and murder – and to shadowy government operative Darius Jedburgh (Ray Winstone), who has been sent in to clean up the evidence. Craven’s solitary search for answers about his daughter’s death transforms into an odyssey of emotional discovery and redemption.

~P

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