“I’m home!”
*stares out the window*
“Hey there! Who want’s their ears scratched?”
*stares out the window*
“Hello? Hey? Are you excited just a little bit to see me?”
*stares out the window*
“I should’ve gotten a dog. They’re happy to see you when you come home.”
*three hours later* “Oh. Hey. When did you get home? Did you get my dinner? And these ears? They’re not going to scratch themselves.”
“. . .”
