“WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE?!”

“I bought a house and moved us.”

“WHY THE HELL DIDN’T YOU WARN ME?”

“I told you several times we were moving.”

‘WHEN?! WHEN DID YOU EVER TELL ME THAT WE WERE MOVING?!”

“Well, there was the night before the move-”

‘I DON’T REMEMBER THAT!”

“-and the night before that-”

‘YOU’RE MAKING THIS UP!”

“-and the night before that-”

“WAS I DRUNK?! DID YOU SLIP SOMETHING INTO MY CATNIP?!”

“-and, pretty much every night for a couple months leading up to the actual move.”

“MAJOR LIFE DECISIONS SHOULD BE CLEARED BY ME BEFORE BEING MADE!”

“Right. Can I go back to sleep now? It’s 3 o’clock in the morning.”

“HOW CAN ANYONE SLEEP AT A TIME LIKE THIS?!”

“It’s easy if your cat will just shut up for a minute.” *turns over*

“DUDE! WHAT-THE-HELL?!”