If life were like a: Comic Book

  • Insurance premiums in major cities would bankrupt most companies/land holders
  • Every city would have an underground sub-city teeming with life
  • Most major cities would have to have large patches rebuilt on a weekly basis due to massive hero/villain battles
  • Spandex would be a best selling item in stores
  • Plutonium? Anyone can get plutonium…
  • Aliens would not only live among us, they would be protecting us from supervillains.
  • Some Aliens would BE supervillains…
  • The Pope could have lunch with Thor (and who wouldn’t want to be a fly on THAT wall?)
  • The oceans wouldn’t need anyone protecting them. That’s what Namor and Aquaman are for
    • …but they’d fight a lot against each other because they’re both pricks
  • Women’s breasts would get larger every couple of months as new artists took over drawing the world for a couple of issues…
  • The guy you and your friends picked on in high school would not only come back to get you, he’d bring his Mole Army with him
  • Interstellar space travel would be here.  Now
  • The ‘no neck, all muscles’ look would be ‘in’ for all guys
  • Every family would have either a hero or a villain in it, or both, making thanksgiving AWKward…
  • If you steal your brothers girlfriend, there’s a good chance he’ll turn evil and plan your eventual destruction with an overly complicated series of melodramatic incidents intended to slowly make you suffer as he has all these years…
  • Mountain overlooks would be prime real estate for supervillains looking to build laser doomsday weapons
  • Narrow mountain passes would contain one of the following:
    • A sinister looking castle
    • A sinister looking ancient fortress carved from the mountain rock
    • The ruins of an ancient castle or sinister looking fortress
    • An ancient monster/demon/threat trapped in ice/rock/crystal just waiting for you to accidentally wake it up
    • Thor’s hammer
    • Some combination of all of the above
  • Mary Jane Watson would’ve lived next door to ME. Dammit!
  • I wouldn’t get earaches…